


ease your mind

by cassleia



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Mutual Pining, Post-Star Wars: A New Hope, Pre-Relationship, They're both a mess, ish?, love language: feeding people, reduced age gap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:01:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25269511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cassleia/pseuds/cassleia
Summary: Cassian watches as the smiles slip from the last princess of Alderaan’s face, and he watches as they begin to return.What he doesn’t notice is that his own begin to return with them.
Relationships: Cassian Andor/Leia Organa
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	ease your mind

Princess Leia smiled easily, something that was a wonder to Cassian. He couldn’t remember the last time a smile had been as easily accessible to him as they seemed to be to the young princess. 

That was a lie, he could recall precisely when they had become laborious to produce, but he had resolved not to unlock that door until there was a need to do so. 

Of course, he didn’t truly know her, but he knew people’s tells. Unless she were a truly wonderful actress these were genuine. Some more so than others, but no matter what, she had smiled more in the short time he’d known her than he could recall doing in quite some time. 

Leia smiled for her parents, for Captain Antilles, for any number of people who cross her path over the course of a day. And why shouldn’t she? 

The assignment on Alderaan isn’t long, but Cassian finds himself keeping that smile in his mind’s eye even deep in the Outer Rim. It represents something he can’t quite pinpoint. Hope, perhaps, that maybe with this effort others may find such ease within their reach.

* * *

When they cross paths later on Cassian notes that Leia’s smiles don’t come as often across a strategy room, which is only appropriate, but she still lights up more often than most. 

Leia returns to the Senate, to her rightful place on Alderaan. She smiles falsely at yet another member on the Imperial payroll, even as she argues passionately in the Senate chambers. There is a ledger and she must carefully counterbalance it. 

Cassian sets out for yet another planet in hopes of unraveling another piece of the web the Imperials have created. It is a noose hanging thick around the galaxy, and Cassian is one person intent on releasing that chokehold.

* * *

There is a pilot on Jedha. There is a planet killer. Tivik is dead, better at his hands than those of the Empire and Cassian Andor hasn’t smiled in months. 

The Senate is a farce. The Imperial flag flies proudly over more and more planets each day. The fire is being smothered and Leia Organa smiles only for her parents now.

* * *

Cassian returns and in the meanwhile, Leia Organa no longer smiles. Her smiles haven’t completely disappeared mind you, she spares a rare smile for her newfound companions. A sweet one for the supposed Jedi, and a slightly exasperated one for an older man who seems to needle the princess as if that were his sole task. 

Still, her smiles are now fleeting, as if they have become a finite resource. It is as if she chases them off immediately upon noticing they have crossed her face. 

Which is a shame, Cassian thinks privately, the princess should always have a reason to smile. It is a shame as well if only because as the last remaining member of House Organa, Leia now bears the weight of her family’s prominence. 

The crushing weight of the destruction of Alderaan hangs over them all, but none so heavily as the young woman who has begun to go many a sleepless night. Cassian knows he can’t fully relate, Fest still stands even if she was all but uninhabitable when he left. 

His planet may be in the grip of the Empire, but there is still a chance, still a hope that one day she may be rebuilt. 

Alderaan is an asteroid field. A suspended graveyard, something that promises rough travels if one were to attempt to navigate it. 

And so Cassian understands why Leia’s smiles have evaporated. His own had done the same in the face of loss after loss, and Leia had just been dealt these blows in one fell swoop. 

They are in a war now. They had been for years, but the inevitability of a full-scale conflict has come to a head now. 

He wonders if anyone is taking care of her in a way that truly gets to those problems. It isn’t his place to wonder, he reminds himself, but he does so all the same. 

People fawn over the princess, of course, condolences abound and she has rarely been left alone, but Cassian doubts anyone has stopped to consider what it is she might truly need. 

They all know what they need from her, but she is not only a figurehead, she is a painfully human woman with needs clear as the rest of them. It is what those are that isn’t as clear. 

Cassian hasn’t slept well for years now, but Scarif had only exacerbated those issues, and so he finds himself wandering the halls of the base, medic’s warnings about his injuries ring in the back of his mind, but he cannot quiet his mind from within his quarters. Weighing the pros and cons of following their directives leads him to the conclusion that what his mind cannot handle, at least for short periods, his body can sacrifice. 

It is a decision he has made time and time again.

* * *

The base is never truly silent, but in the dead of the night, there is a sort of hush that descends over it. It is almost eerie, the hushed tones of those that attempt to respect the manufactured normalcy of the rest who still attempt sleep, 

He finds Leia often, their paths crossing as those of lost souls tend to do, neither one feeling a need to fully acknowledge the other. They may not be close, but there is an understanding that flourishes between them. 

There is an understanding that doesn’t exist among many others, they both know the roles they have been set out to play. 

More often than not, they pass one another in the halls, each on a vain quest for peace that, for now, must remain solitary. 

The first time Leia smiles upon seeing him Cassian is almost certain he’s dreamt it, a bare quirk of her lips that is gone just as quickly as it appeared. It sticks out in his mind if for no other reason than because he hasn’t seen that from her in too long. 

Cassian continues on his way, but he carries that smile with him. There is something different about the princess’s smiles in comparison with those of anyone else, though what it was Cassian couldn’t quite put his finger on. 

The next nights are difficult ones, Cassian has always hated being on this end of the communications, nothing to do but endlessly wait while men he’s known for years miss check-ins.

* * *

The next time it happens Cassian is able to anticipate it, the sight of a second steaming mug of shuura tea pulls a smile out of her. When he’d begun to make two cups he can’t quite pinpoint, but the grateful smile he gets now makes any inconveniences there might have been well worth it. 

The smile doesn’t last, but she hasn’t hidden it for once. “Thank you, Captain,” she hums, wrapping both of her hands around the mug as she pulls it close to her chest. 

Cassian nods, sliding into a seat next to her. She’s still smiling when she looks up at him, a slight thing, unsteady, but unmistakable. Before he can think about it, she has pulled an even rarer smile from him. The feeling is odd, as is the emotion that flashes in her eyes for a moment. “It wasn’t any trouble, princess.”

Her fingers flexed against the cup, a minuscule movement, but noticeable all the same. Perhaps it was because he was becoming attuned to her for an odd reason, but that wasn’t something he could confront now. 

“You’re an interesting man Captain Andor,” she chimes up after a moment. Her dark eyes rove his face, and for a moment Cassian feels naked in a way that he hasn’t before. It is as if his mind has been unraveled and laid out for her to examine, despite the carefully constructed barriers. 

The moment is broken when the princess looks away, and if he isn’t mistaken, there is a slight blush gracing her cheeks. 

“Cassian,” he murmurs, taking a long sip of his own tea. He doesn’t know why he says it, there is a level of intimacy he hasn’t granted himself to the moment, and it hangs in the air, unaddressed. 

Leia’s eyebrow raises, though she doesn’t look back up, focused on the way the steam curls up from her mug. “Alright,” she acknowledges, “then none of that princess nonsense, I’m Leia to you. After all, with how often we’ve met I think you’re one of the only people who hasn’t demanded strictly Rebellion business.” 

That gives Cassian pause, it’s true though, most nights if they do discuss anything, it is related to the war, but only tangentially, in a way that is distinct from any of the strategy meetings that have become the only thing he’s allowed to participate in merely a month out from Scarif. “Leia,” he tries out, the word fading into the night around them. 

The night passes in relative silence after that, and Cassian can’t help but appreciate the companionship. With tea drained from the mug, Cassian reluctantly stands. Despite not being actively on the front, he has been kept busy with days that start early and end late. “I should go, but I’ll see you tomorrow night?” he asks, tacking on the questioning lilt at the end, almost as an afterthought. 

Leia nods “Consider it a standing appointment,” she says, a conspiratorial glint in her eyes.

* * *

Leia spotted Cassian first, calling out to him where his back was still turned. Cassian’s eyes softened when he saw her, though his body still carried the exhaustion from the most recent mission. 

He likely should have been sleeping, but he had missed her, and so instead, he found himself dangling a small bag before her. “I brought you something,” he said, the words uncertain, even as his hand remained steady. 

Leia cocked her head to one side, letting the bag drop into her hand. “You didn’t have to,” she said, even as she undid the simple tie. Her eyes sparkled when she saw what it contained. “Meiloorun candies?"

“I wanted to,” he said simply. The words were more of an admission than he was comfortable saying. The purchase had been an impulse, the stand had caught his eye in a market and the princess had immediately come to mind. 

Leia glanced up at him curiously and once again Cassian felt as if his entire being was on display. “Thank you,” she said unwrapping one and popping it into her mouth. The look of pure contentment on her face is thanks enough. “Here, have one, I know you didn’t save any for yourself,” she hums, equal parts reprimand and offer, even with the smile that breaks out as she looks up at him. 

One day, maybe, that radiant smile might stretch across Leia’s face more regularly, but Cassian was nothing if not trained in patience, he could wait until then. 

And maybe, just maybe there was something growing between them, but that was something to address another day. 

For now, there was a young woman smiling at him with a hand outstretched, and for once, Cassian found himself able to return it.


End file.
